Bullies- Momma Bear

Since I was too little to really even fend for myself....I have had a ZERO tolerance for bullies....short fuse.   Even shorter now that I'm a Mom.  

When I was a little squirt, I was swinging on the swings at a local school, on a weeknight,  when these 2 big kids came over to me and my cousin and tried to yank us off the swings.  There were about 7 or 8 of us at the playground together so not for one second did I hesitate to tell these bullies they had to wait their turn!!!

Then I looked around ....and I was all alone.

everyone else had cleared the playground...long gone...no one in sight.

Now ......

there were plenty of swings for me and the 2 big ole bullies.  But they didn't want those swings....OH NO...they wanted the one I was on.

There I was...on the playground...all alone...with 2 bullies more than twice my size...and I just didn't have it in me to let them have the swing I was on.

I'd like to say that my standing up to them..made them leave me alone.  But..that is not the case.

They proceeded to drag me off the swing.  One grabbed my hands and held them behind my back while the other got me in a head lock.  They then showed me the brick wall that they were going to bash my head into because I didn't willingly give them the swing I was on.

I was so scared...I really thought  they were going to kill me.

Once they got me within inches of the brick wall...

The one who had me in a headlock...stood directly in front of me...laughing hysterically at how much fun it was going to be to see blood squirt from my head.  The other one standing behind me laughing just as hard and telling me I should have just given them the swing and I could have lived.

And in a flash...

I kicked em...

right between the legs...

with all the power, adrenaline and fear flowing through my veins...I sent them both to their knees.  I took off running so fast I should have won an olympic medal, world record and whatever other prize for speed is out there.


I made it to my front door ....I was safe...for now.

And then...as soon as my Dad found out...he was out that door on their trail.

He went to the boys house...(I lived in a small town)...my Dad found that boy on the front porch...and the boy started taunting my Dad.."you can't get me...nannana..." as he backed off his porch into his house.     my Dad said...(with the little boys Dad standing in the background not really caring about what just took place...)  "Let me tell you something lil boy... You EVER lay a hand on my daughter again...I don't care who's house you're in, if your Dad's there or not...I will come get you!  If you so much as look at my daughter again...you will be sorry you did!"

And with that...when I walked down the halls at school...neither one of the boys would ever make eye contact.

As a mommy... how horrifying to find your child is a bully ...or being bullied.

Parents-  it's not cute when they are 2 or 10 or 16 for a child..to use fear, manipulation, sarcasm, physical or verbal power to get their way...

Additionally...if you see bullying ...anywhere...as adults...we have an obligation to step in..whether your child is involved or not.  To just walk away because you don't know the parties involved is shameful.  Bullying can be physical or verbal...both of which are very damaging.

As parents..we can't be everywhere. ...we can't prevent kids from being mean to each other.  My goodness, sometimes adults are worse than kids in this regard.   What we can do, is talk to our kids about what bullying is...what to do if they or anyone they come in contact with is being bullied.  We don't want our kids to put themselves in harms way by becoming involved in a potentially physical situation...but we need to teach them what to do.

TEACH THEM WHAT TO DO...we spend a lot of time saying DON'T do this or that...when we need to probably focus our attention more on teaching them what TO DO..TO SAY and How to act.

Here are some links on bullying...that will help you initiate conversation with your child....

 

Bullying.org

Stop Bullyng Now

Bully Basics

Bullyng is a Big Problem

What causes bullying?

Intervention/Prevention

Coping with bullies: Tips for Parents

I have and will continue to have conversation with my children concerning bullying and being bullied.   I want them to know what to do and have the necessary tools to deal with situations like this when I am not present.

From childhood...I have always been a confident person for the most part.  I have encountered "bullies" in many varying degrees from Childhood and even in my adult life.  Although it is extremely unpleasant, inconvenient, hurtful and downright painful at times...I can deal with it and move on for the most part unaffected other than the inconvenience and irritation of having to deal with the ridiculous person.

However...this is Mommy speaking...and I am much like my father in regard to bullies.

You mess with my child...you have most certainly messed with me.  Not just my child though...I see bullying...I see unconcerned nonreactive parent....You will most definitely see...MOMMA BEAR.
  I am a kind person, a great friend, a loving daughter and a MOMMA BEAR!!
If your child acts up..handle it..or...someone else might....  just saying.

Complete guide to Dallas-area farmers markets | News for Dallas, Texas | Dallas Morning News | Cooking tips | Food | Dallas Morning News

Complete guide to Dallas-area farmers markets | News for Dallas, Texas | Dallas Morning News | Cooking tips | Food | Dallas Morning News

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No Laundry Fairy Here!

Ah isn't she special!  

SHE DOES NOT LIVE AT MY HOUSE.   

Yes, I tried to say that loud enough for my children to hear. :)  For some time now, my kiddos have helped out in some aspect of our laundry process.   We're talking since the age they were learning colors...they would help me sort for as long as their attention span could handle.   One of their favorite activities..still to this day..is getting to put the laundry in the washing machine or switching it from the washer to the dryer. (yes that's right...the fun never stops at our house!)

Everyone's LEAST favorite task (including mine) is putting laundry away!  That is where a laundry fairy would be super nice really.  But alas, it is not a reality for us.   So, due to the fact that it has always been my least favorite part of doing laundry...to fold and put it up that is...my kids have always "helped" me put clothes away in their room.  When they were 2...it looked like this...

Me-  Ok punkin lets go put laundry away in your room

they would follow me to their room and stand by me while I put it away or I would hand them something and tell them exactly where to put it.

As they got older...I would go to their room with them..and make sure they put  things in the proper place and show them HOW to put things away.  Like, not tossing the clothes I just folded into the bottom of the closet or shoving it in a drawer and calling it done!

Now that they are 6 and 8 9 ( ugh..he just turned 9..boohoo)  ...I put their laundry in their respective baskets and they are able to do it, for the most part, unsupervised.

I grew up with a laundry fairy Mom. (I love her..she's my hero)   But what I realized...when reality hit me and I was out of college and married and had no laundry fairy in my life was, it was a lot of work to do laundry even for just one person!!     (Did I say my Mom is awesome!)   

I'm not like my Mom in the laundry fairy department...my kids clothes have never magically appeared fresh and clean in their drawers..they have, from a very early age had a hand in the process.   Sometimes...it took twice as long to do the laundry because they were "helping".  I'm hoping that by having them involved..they will be well aware, when they are on their own or married ...that it's a lot of work..and their help is needed...and that it's not really too considerate to leave all the laundry duties to one person in the family.  I hope their spouses will thank me later....

And as far as spouses go...

my husband rocks- 

He helps with laundry a lot...and keeps it going when weeks are hectic and crazy.  

As for my Mom-  thanks..for being my laundry fairy...if you miss that role in my life..you are welcome to visit and resume those responsibilities anytime!!  heheheheh...Love you Mom....

Some of you are laundry fairies 

(don't feel bad..there is nothing wrong with it...just not my thing) 

Maybe you are a Laundry fairy because: you want it done a certain way, folded, put in drawers a specific way or you just love doing laundry etc...If it makes you happier to just do it yourself then by all means...wear your wings with pride.

I am controlling about some things..laundry...is just not one of them, I will engage and encourage all the help I can get to make it go away quickly. :)

Ready for Summer - Sun and Sand

I'm so ready for relaxing, sunny days .  Lounging by the pool, reading a good book.   Going to the beach whenever possible...and at the end of the summer...for all of you who are with me...
on the beach scene...our cars may just look like

THIS

Embracing Your Second Calling by Dale Hanson Bourke

A BOOK REVIEW:

What's this book about anyway???

It says it's about finding Passion in the 2nd part of your life...(aka midlife).  Are your kids grown? Is the nest empty?  OR are you simply at the adult moment when you are ready to redirect and reevaluate some or all of your goals, your purpose, your significance?  

EMBRACING YOUR SECOND CALLING by Dale Hanson Bourke is a self proclaimed "Women's Guide" to the time of life that brings us to a place of reconsidering what our priorities and wants and goals really are and how we want them to play out now, that we aren't feeling invincible any longer.

This book actually started out gloomy to me.  The referral to kids being grown and everything sagging and coming to terms with the fact that maybe that's how God wants us to be now really was off putting to me.  I mean..come on, it sounded sorta depressing.  But   I read on.  

As I continued to read it was unfolding as more of a story about her experience.  One in which she was very presumptuous as to imply that her motives were every other woman's  motive.  This really irritated me for some reason.  She said, " WE worked because...we had been well educated and encouraged not to "waste" our education, and because the lifestyle we wanted to live required the income from two careers."  Now, it's not that this is not true in some cases, but to say as a whole, that is why WE work is frustrating. I know many women who simply enjoy their careers. Their motivation isn't their lifestyle..but they enjoy a nice lifestyle as a result of their success in a career they enjoy.  I'm just saying, I had to comment on that particular thing.  :)

I really wanted to like this book.  I just didn't care for it though.   Quite simply I disagree with what she says on success and significance.    To me..it's not about raising kids, having a career and THEN in your second calling doing something of significance.  Why wait?  I'm not supporting the concept of drive your self insane trying to do everything RIGHT NOW.  I just  really think that they do not have to be at odds with each other and can co exist in your life...  For me...this just wasn't a book that applied to where I'm at in life...and I didn't really get it.  I didn't Get it...could have summed up the whole book....  It seems this book, instead of being billed as a GUIDE BOOK for women would have better been classified as a story about her life, a memoir or something of that nature.  It guides us through her life..generalizing her journey as every woman's journey...just didn't get it.

To comply with new regulations introduced by the Federal Trade Commission, I must post that Thomas Nelson has provided me with a complimentary copy of this book to review.

Monday Madness 5/10

What is Monday Madness?Monday Madness was created by : mommy bloggers Micael and Meghan. Mommy, daddy,
single, stay at home parent, working parent, blogger, non-blogger, pie lover, pie hater (who hates pie, seriously).... it doesn't matter who you are or what you do, Monday's tend to be crazy, right? So we thought we would bring a little fun into your Monday routine. And at the same time you'll get to check out new blogs, network with others, make new friends and connections - multitasking at its best!
So what do I do to participate?
It's really easy to participate with us! Just follow the steps below and you'll be set!

1. Follow the hostess blogs at Saving Obsession and The Tuckers Take Tennessee for some Madness Lovin'.
2. Grab the McLinky code and make a post on your blog about Monday Madness*, so more people can join in the fun!
3. Add your blog name and link* to the McLinky below.
4. Check out some of the blogs on the list and follow ones you like. Leave a comment to let them know you're from Monday Madness.
5. If someone follows your blog, follow them back to keep the Madness going.

*Please use a direct link to your Monday Madness post in the McLinky.

That's it! Visit and follow as few or as many blogs as you'd like! 

Summer Reading...

I feel more than blessed to have 2 kiddos who absolutely love to READ!  Since I'm an avid reader myself it more than warms heart to curl up in bed with a good book at night..and have my 2 kiddos curled up right by me reading their latest book of choice.


Sara has read almost all of the Junie B Jones series.  Connor and Sara both think the GERONIMO STILTON books are too funny and read everyone they can get their hands on more than once.   They get so excited when I need to swing by Barnes & Noble..because that means...they will usually leave with a new book they'll have almost completely read before we even get home.  :)

So when I saw that Barnes &  Noble was having a summer reading program ...I just had to share it here.  Check it out....  Read 8 books...earn a free one.  Woo hoo... It looks like a fun program...
Check the details out at BARNES & NOBLE

Download your passport and get to reading!  What fun...

revised:

Thanks to Sharon's Comment below- here's some info on Half Price Books Summer Reading Program

Just noticed from BURBMOM.com that Borders  (click on Borders to go to their website) has a summer reading program as well...

Make your Own Chicken Nuggets/Strips! Woot Woot!

Now that you know what a majority of store bought chicken nuggets are made of... (if you didn't see my previous post..check it out HERE and watch the 2nd video on how/what processed chicken nuggets are made...)

After watching it...I'm guessing, you're going to want a different option?!  My alternative is to make my own.   I buy a jumbo pack or two of chicken breasts, cut them up into nuggets or strips, cook them and store them in the fridge or freezer for the week.  (I make them once a week but could make them and stock them up in the freezer if I needed to..they reheat great after being frozen).

For a crunchier crust..you can add a tablespoon or 2 of cornstarch to the flour mixture...but that's totally a preference thing and they'd be fine without.

My Recipe- (this is approx. because I don't actually measure stuff out unless I'm baking.)
8 chicken breasts cubed or cut in strips
2 cups all purpose flour
1 pkg Italian salad dressing seasoning
2 tbsp corn starch
2 eggs with a splash of milk
salt , pepper to taste

Dry Ingredients-
Mix flour, Italian seasoning mix and corn starch in a shallow bowl set aside.
Whisk Eggs, Milk , salt n pepper in a shallow bowl.
Place a handful of cubed or strips of chicken in flour...coat lightly then place in egg mixture.
After all chicken has been in flour then egg...start putting chicken pieces back into flour mixture for second/final breading.  AS you bread these place on a cooking sheet ..with the bottom of the cookie sheet lightly covered with flour.

Place Frying pan on the stove (cast iron is the best in my opinion but you can fry them in any type of pan)  fill about 1/2 full with oil and turn heat to med. high.  Cook chicken in batches for about 6 to 8 minutes each. (breading will be golden brown)   Or you can bake if you prefer...400 degree oven for about 15 to 20 min.

There are so many ways you can season these differently than using the Italian Season mix...or the egg mixture even..

Options..
replace Italian packet with Ranch seasoning packet
Use any of your favorite seasonings to replace Italian packet


Instead of egg... baste chicken with
honey mustard or blue cheese dressing or ranch dressing, Italian dressing, Caesar dressing... if you baste it with any of these you would skip the first flour dredge and just dredge through flour after basting.

To the flour mixture..you can also add..Bisquick or breadcrumbs, Parmesan cheese, crushed cornflakes. etc...

some people like to add a touch of sugar to their flour mixture...this is a nice addition and is very tasty but one that I do not use often.

For more Great chicken breading options  check out these sites:
Paula Deen Chicken Nuggets
The Pioneer Woman Chicken Strips
Go to All Recipes and search Chicken nuggets for a lot of options

Cassidy over at Food Prude had some great options as well..find them HERE

Please share any recipes, websites, ideas you have on how to make foods that our kids will love and that can be easy, convenient and a healthy alternative to processed foods.

Where does our food come from? Are you Hungry for Change?

Okay..so the other day...I'm sharing my thoughts with you about the importance of my children being able to have french fries and a sprite when they get a Happy Meal..(gasp..AHHH..noooo!)

But there's more to it than that...

When we eat at home, which is more often than not..we eat pretty healthy.   The whole well-balanced thing going on most of the time.   Eating out is like our...Cheat day.

I thought it might be useful for you to see the other side of the coin that is Mommily Ever After.  That would be the one who likes to know where my food comes from and whats in it..how it was made etc. etc...
It amazes me (even me..who lets my children eat fries from fast food joints...) how little so many of us really know about what we're feeding our families.

That's can all change with the viewing of one lil ole show called...Food Inc.   watch this trailer.


I have this DVD.and actually watched in a bit of horror as the documentary unfolded.  Then to add to it..right about that time...JAMIE OLIVERS Food Revolution came on TV.  When he showed how Chicken nuggets were made..I was sick!! EWWW...



Let me know if you've watched either one of these.   What are your thoughts? Reactions?  How has or will it change how you feed your family.

Most of us...will have our "cheat" days, times whatever you want to call them. But I'm sure a vast majority of us want to present our families with well balanced meals, food, options.

I love visiting sites with great ideas for quick yet healthy snacks as well as meal idea.
Would love to hear websites or blogs that you enjoy....

A friend of mine just started a blog and has some great posts on there for snack ideas.  Check it out at
Food Prude.  Yes we're friends and no..she didn't disown me after my post on french fries.  We got quite a nice chuckle when we saw we were both posting on fast food. (Albeit hers was a much healthier post!)

We're Different- We're The Same

As you may have noticed- from my previous post..while I may not have been "born with the Mommy Gene"  I am comfortable in my role as a parent and the decisions I make for my family.   Just like most of you, I am doing my best to raise healthy, well-rounded, well-adjusted, well-mannered children who will go into adulthood well equipped and prepared for a life of their choosing. 

I have strong preferences and solid reasons why I make the choices I make as a parent.  That being said, it is important to me, that people know, my confidence in the choices I make as a parent are not in anyway passing judgment on or a criticism to other parents who may choose differently for their family.  I receive- at times, judgemental comments (see my post from yesterday on French Fries ) and defensive statements from people I know and barely know regarding the decisions they make and why they made them.   Don't get me wrong, I'm interested to know what brought you to your decision (most of the time...sometimes ...I don't really care why you chose differently than i did) .  What I'm not interested in...is you presenting a dissertation on your choice and why it's better than mine or why your way is right and mine is wrong.

I'm of the opinion, that Parenting choices and decisions are many times...preference...NOT right and wrong.   The Dynamics in each family are so very different.  From how much Dad works, to whether Mom stays home, works part time, full time, works from home ....

All these choices...are preferences...some Mom's like to work outside the home  which makes them a more effective Mom and wife ...I applaud them..it's not easy to juggle.

Some Mom's heart desire is to Stay Home...and are very fulfilled in that role.   One choice isn't BETTER or RIGHT...they are Just ...say it with me....

DIFFERENT

Practice this thinking the next time you are speaking with a Mom...and she's made a choice that you instantly think or feel..."Oh, that's not right!"  or "Why would she do that..it'd be so much better to...."

Retrain your thinking...(don't say it out loud)

"Well, that's DIFFERENT than what I have done."  

or 

"It's interesting that they decided to handle that situation in that way."

Our kids aren't the only ones who need attitude adjustments sometimes.  Attitudes start with the thoughts we own.  Try not to own those judgmental thoughts but replace them with more positive and useful thoughts.  

As Mom's, we need to be supportive of the many choices we have today. It's amazing that we are able, today, to choose what Motherhood looks like for us and that Mommy's come in all shapes and sizes.  This is empowering, amazing and we should embrace our differences, not use them to shame or embarrass or judge each other.

You see..we all need to realize, we don't have "THE ANSWER" to parenting decisions for everyone else.  Do what's best for your family...I'll do what's best for mine and someone else will do something entirely different for their family..  As a general rule that won't equal good, better , best... It will equal ....come on ...you can say it ....

DIFFERENT

Are their ever right or wrong choices in parenting?  Of course...but generally speaking, I'd say more often than not...our disdain or disapproval of someones parenting is unwarranted, inappropriate and usually unwelcome.

  That being said...if I ask you, or you ask me what I think....be Honest.  If we are not asked our opinion on parenting situations, it's probably going to come across as judgmental or condescending to share unsolicited advice or opinions.

Mom, Mommy, Mother whatever that looks like in your house or home, life...embrace with confidence what is best for your family. You see, that's where we're the same...we want what's best for our family.  We want our children to be better equipped than we were heading into adulthood.    What works for you may not work for your friends...and that's okay.  No need to apologize, or feel bad.  Don't try to be someone else.....your kids need the best you....you're teaching them each day...that it's okay to be who they are by being okay with who you are....

Have a great week!

My kids Drink Sprite, Eat Fries and I let them have candy...

and I'm unapologetic about it.  This is not a "confession" as much as a statement that...Ummm....the decisions I make for my children are well...mine to make.

  Unless I am asking for nutritional advice from you or your posse..I really don't want to hear the "Ohhh...so you all got sprite not milk?  Ohhhh and fries not apple slices??"  hmmm... Thank you random stranger for stating the obvious.  Maybe you should work on your judgemental, parenting superiority complex and manners before you put my child's nutritional well-being on your to do list.  Just a thought but hey, it's your decision right... :)

I love my children, way more than you or even my dearest friend and family members.  I personally, do not have a problem with letting them have sprite and french fries with their happy meal.  (oh my did i hear a gasp from the nutritional parenting police when I said Happy Meal?)

They eat candy too...

yes I know...chocolate chip cookie and not fruit for dessert...just gets some peoples blood boiling.    So, as I'm ripping your child's teeth out of my little girls arm at the restaurant playground,  or having to go to another restaurant all together because your child used the playplace as their personal toilet (yes..this has actually happened!)....maybe, instead of gasping at  my perceived lack of nutritional parenting skills...you could focus on your childs ability to function in public around other well fed, well rounded, well mannered children.

Just saying...